"Turning Red" Made Me Cry, Laugh, and Remember Who I Am
Wow.
That was literally the first word out of my mouth when I finished Turning Red. It took me back! OMG, I felt like I was reliving my adolescence. Can we say NKOTB, NSYNC, and 98 Degrees? (Sorry y’all, I was not Team Backstreet Boys!) And don't even get me started on my R&B obsession: Shai, H-Town, Blackstreet, Jodeci, KC & Jojo… whew! Turning Red made me feel 13 again—going through all of those big, confusing emotions alongside Mei.
And honestly? It brought tears to my eyes.
I don’t know Mei's full origin story, but I know mine: the child of Nigerian immigrants. I was expected to be perfect—make straight A’s, go to Harvard, and become a doctor or lawyer. That’s not unique in the Nigerian-American community. Instead, I defied every expectation: I became a Family Therapist, had a starting lineup of kids, and now my children love to tell people that I “put signs in yards and make cookies for a living.” Oh, and I’m adding Disney to the mix too. Talk about pursuing happiness on my own terms!
But Turning Red isn't just about being quirky or different—it's deeply layered. It's about the invisible pressure many kids of immigrants feel to uphold family honor while navigating life in a completely different culture. The movie’s setting might be in Canada, but its heart resonates worldwide.
Happiness vs. Honor: A Tug-of-War for First-Gen Kids
So many of us know that conflict Mei feels: the desire to honor your culture and your parents, while also trying to figure out who you really are. It’s the unspoken fear of failing your family when your heart is leading you in another direction. For Mei, it’s choosing between being the perfect daughter or going to a 4Town concert with her friends.
That tension is real. I remember wanting to go to school dances or sleepovers, while knowing my parents would never understand. It wasn't rebellion—it was me wanting to be a part of the world I was living in, while still respecting the world they came from. That balancing act is exhausting. Turning Red captured that beautifully.
The Parenting Lessons That Hit Me
This film doesn’t just hit the kids—it hits the parents. HARD.
Our children are not our second chance.
Ming, Mei's mom, loves her deeply—but she also wants to preserve her own legacy through her daughter. That hits a nerve. So often, immigrant parents feel they sacrificed everything for their kids—and they did—but that can unintentionally lead to control or emotional enmeshment. The real parenting lesson here? Letting go is love, too.Listen before you correct.
When Mei starts transforming (literally and emotionally), her mom rushes in with solutions and assumptions—especially around menstruation. But Mei doesn't need to be fixed; she needs to be heard. As a therapist, I see this all the time. Kids don't always need us to parent with answers; sometimes they need us to sit in the confusion with them.Let them tell their story.
One of my favorite moments in the film was when Mei's mom learned that she had also struggled as a teenager. That moment—seeing the red panda in her mother, and grandmother, and aunties—was so healing. Sometimes we forget our kids are writing their own story, not repeating ours.
The Power of Sharing Stories
I always say: when we hear someone’s story, we begin to understand the humanity behind their choices.
After the movie, I sat with my kids and asked what they thought. (I wish the video had better lighting, but their reactions were real and raw.) My 10- and 7-year-old boys told me what they liked, what they didn’t understand, and what made them laugh. It was such a reminder that our children are paying attention—even when we think they’re too young to “get it.”
I didn’t share my daughter’s video—she asked me not to—but her insights were equally powerful. These conversations matter. And movies like Turning Red open the door to have them.
Things Some Parents Might Want to Know (Spoilers Below!)
Let’s talk about some themes that may be triggering or uncomfortable, depending on your family’s values or your child’s developmental stage:
Menstruation: It’s only lightly referenced, but yes—it’s there. When Mei starts transforming into a red panda, her mom assumes it’s her first period. My 7-year-old daughter didn’t catch it at all, and my boys—who are familiar with the concept—just shrugged. Honestly? I think the more we normalize these conversations, the less taboo it becomes, half of the population has a period, WHY ARE WE TRYING TO HIDE THIS🤦🏾♀️.
Spirituality & Rituals: The movie features Chinese spirituality, temple settings, ancestral rituals, and symbolic animal transformation. If your family practices a different religion, this could be worth discussing. As a Christian who has visited temples in Taiwan, I found it beautiful. It sparked rich conversations with my kids about honoring other people’s beliefs while holding space for our own.
Teen Rebellion & Respect: Some reviewers say Mei is disrespectful. As a parent of tweens, let me just say this: if your child has never rolled their eyes, shouted "You don't understand!" or made a bad decision in middle school—let me know your secrets. Turning Red doesn’t glamorize rebellion; it shows how kids process identity and push boundaries. It's developmentally appropriate, and it’s honest.
Final Thoughts: Why Turning Red Is More Than Just a Movie
This movie is about more than pandas, boy bands, and glittery chaos. It’s a love letter to first-generation kids everywhere who are navigating two worlds. It’s a celebration of emotional messiness. It’s a gentle nudge for parents to reflect on what expectations we place on our kids and why.
And maybe most importantly, it’s a call to embrace change—not just in our kids, but in ourselves. Watching Turning Red reminded me that it's okay to be proud of who I am, even if the path I took wasn’t the one my parents planned. And it reminded me to hold space for my kids to do the same.
Even if they grow up saying I put signs in yards, make cookies, and talk about Disney all day. I’ll take it.
Want to open up this conversation with your kids?
Try asking:
What would your red panda look like?
What’s something you want to do that you’re nervous to tell me about?
What’s something about me (your parent) that you don’t understand but want to?
Because the more we listen, the more we learn. And the more we learn, the better we love.
Rating: Turning Red is rated PG for thematic material, suggestive content, and brief language.
Synopsis:
Turning Red follows 13-year-old Mei Lee, a confident and quirky teen caught between honoring her mother’s expectations and embracing the messy magic of adolescence. As if growing up wasn’t complicated enough, Mei discovers that when she gets overly excited or emotional… she transforms into a giant red panda!
Planning a trip to Walt Disney World? You're in the right place! At Well Hello Magic, we have tons of helpful resources to make your Disney vacation as magical and stress-free as possible. Whether you're looking for advice on the best time to visit Disney, tips on finding the perfect character meal, or learning how to skip the lines with Lightning Lane, we've got you covered.
As a therapist by trade and a mom of four, I use my expertise in understanding personalities to help you discover your "Disney Enneagram"—a fun way to tailor your Disney vacation planning to suit your family's needs or large group dynamics, ensuring everyone enjoys the magic in their own unique way. With my firsthand experience navigating Disney with babies and toddlers, I'll share all my best tips to make your trip smooth and fun for everyone. Plus, check out some of our family's favorite rides at Magic Kingdom—there's something for everyone to enjoy!
Make sure to explore our blog for even more Disney planning guides and insider tips!
.
.
.
Thank you for visiting the Well Hello Magic Blog. If you have questions, please leave them in the comments, and I will be sure to answer them.
Planning a Disney vacation can be overwhelming, but you don't need to worry because we have got your back! Here are a few blogs to help you get organized!
Follow me on Instagram, YouTube and Check out my Podcast!
How to Use My Disney Experience: Your Hub For Your Disney Vacation
How to Use Standby Skipper: The App That Books Your Lighting Lanes
Disney Infants: Everything You Need to Know! : Children under 3 are FREE at Disney
Tips for Traveling with Family, Friends & Large Groups
What is Lightning Lane Multi Pass and Single Pass? : Learn to Skip The Lines at Dsiney
Everything You Need to Know about Strollers at Disney
What to do if you Get Sick at Disney
Baby Care Centers at Walt Disney World
The Differences between Walt Disney World and Disneyland Resort
Who is the Mom behind Well Hello Magic?
I am so happy to be on this journey with you.
